Desirability converts ordinary choices into status reports other people read about themselves. Your yes feels like a promotion they can flaunt. Your no feels like a downgrade they need to defend against. In that environment, every boundary you set becomes emotionally loud, even when you whisper it.

I gave them the chance to say something before the consequences became permanent. I gave them the chance to help prevent this from going further. And they took that opportunity and set it on fire.